Intentionality

A Thousand Dimensions of Me

We are changing all the time. Not just our cells that make up our bodies, but our minds, our actions, our intentions. Deleting, adding, adjusting, staying the same…

A few weeks ago, I attended an evening of philosophy that had numerous lectures, workshops and activities. I went by myself because I failed to recruit any friends to spend their Friday evenings listening to talks about “what we owe to each other” or about the Socratic Discourse.

When I was there, I joined a drawing and painting activity where we were giving a few options to pursue. I chose to make a self portrait, and this is what I came up with.

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There are two people that I started to develop in this image. The person at the bottom like a wave, and the one upside down with a leaf and circles coming out of the head. It can also be seen from the inverse direction.

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I started this activity with only 10 minutes to do it. A time limitation that felt like real life. A project that I wanted more time to complete. A part of me that I wanted more time to work on. A project that is never fully done. A project of self that is always incomplete.

I have this painting by my bed now, and I think about where I am in it. Who am I? Am I her in blue? Am I swirling through space? Perhaps I am also the red flowers on the sides. Perhaps I am part of the red and yellow triangles of light. Perhaps I am part of the leaves.

I think I am all of those things. Piece by piece. At different moments. Changing and swirling through time.

As an artist presenting a lecture at the business school yesterday said, “to do anything, you always have a piece of yourself you must leave behind.”

I can’t keep all aspects of myself. But I will try and preserve the good ones and keep iterating on others. Letting that which is ephemeral be ephemeral.

 

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