Travel

Focus.

Focus. I used to be able to focus. Now…

Think. I used to be able to think clearly and quickly. Now my brain is all jumbled. Focus.

Forget. I used to never forget what I was doing. Now I keep forgetting what it was that I was going to do next. Focus.

Write. I used to write, here and there and everywhere. Now I scan a lot of things about coronavirus, but don’t know if I am really reading anything. Focus.

Happy. I used to be happy. Now I am too, but I also feel a lot of emotions that I didn’t feel as often: sadness, anger, anxiety, disappointment, an itching, a restlessness, a fogginess. Focus.

Thankful. I used to thank you for connecting with me. Now I thank you again for being there with me. In this. In all of this. and in whatever might come.

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Keep a diary, I’ve been told.

This is my diary – this blog as a public display of self since 2014. Once a week, and as needed.

Today, I couldn’t focus. Yesterday, I couldn’t either. Same story the day before.

Each day is a process. A journey. A step.

A word written. A word deleted.

Hello?

Are you home?

I hope you stayed home.

Do you have food?

Have you seen anyone?

Hello?

I see you, dear.

You’re on mute, again.

Can you unmute yourself?

Hello?

That’s all for now.

Like I said, today wasn’t in focus.

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One thought on “Focus.

  1. Can you post this somewhere more prominent. It is something we are all struggling with our inability to focus as our world has been turned upside down. One of the smartest most laser focused doctors I know ( not your dad haha) just yesterday said to me that he was having a hard time working as a physician due to his inability to concentrate. He stopped mid sentence to find his words to even articulate this. I love the poetic nature to your blog post. It is heartwarming and gives us a sense of community to know no matter your vocation or your life circumstance we are in this together and are all feeling the emotional side of change. Lack of focus.

    Like

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